by Audrey Singer
I always wonder about the power of positivity, especially when some great negative force is released into the world. Mass shootings. Political upheaval. Etc. Sometimes I get real sad because the negativity seems so strong, like an unstoppable force. But then I start thinking about the sun, and how none of us would exist without it doing what it does. Just living its best life out there in space, shining away. Fusing atoms and exploding out light into a very very dark universe. We are alive because of the sun. If the sun is not a beacon of light in the vast blackness of space, then I don’t know what is.
Recently, I was reminded how contagious emotions are, and that there is all of this research showing negativity is more contagious than positivity. Emotions spread. Depression spreads. There has been research with college students where they put a depressed person with positive people, and everyone will sink to the depressed person’s level. I’m sure we have all experienced this. If you are with someone that is a thundercloud, it is really hard not to be affected by that storm. We have seen the effects of a social contagion of panic and unrest when riots break out, etc. But my ridiculous optimistic brain wonders; why is this? Why is this the place we have evolved to? I mean, it makes sense evolutionarily that the frownie biscuits among us were more likely to survive. I am, of course, not the only one to wonder this, because many a scientist have also been trying to answer this question. But does this state of affairs have to be the end of our evolution? If swimming in a pool of sad is always available, wouldn’t positivity also be available? Isn’t positivity also an option? Could we continue our evolution into balls of light in the universe like the sun?
I remember when I was in my 20s, I had this idea one day of my heart being some sort of electric blue nuclear reactor. Perhaps, I could fuse some love atoms together in the chambers of my heart and have some sort of e=mc^2 reaction. Love and positivity would just explode out and engulf everyone almost instantly in a 5 mile blast radius. The people close by would, of course, be immediately engulfed in love and positivity. The love radiation would just continue to spread and spread for miles and across time. It’s an idea that has always caught my imagination, and I seem to come back to it a lot. I keep thinking, is this possible?
I start thinking about “energy” and the power of thought and story. I think about people like Ghandi or Mother Theresa and what they achieved in the world. I think about the swamis or really ‘spiritual’ people I’ve met, and what it was like to be in their presence. How peace and well being just seemed to emanate off of them. I wonder what it takes to be this sort of person. What thoughts would I think? What would I have to believe to be a nuclear reactor of joy into the world? And what would that do to those around me?
What thoughts or emotions could I fuse together inside the chambers of my heart, because thought is just energy, right? Chemical and electrical signals? Surely I could fuse something that would just expand and expand and expand. Something that is as big and powerful and pervasive as the yuck yuck that I see. Surely I have a sun shiny star inside me just waiting to ignite. Surely, we all do. Is it ideas and stories that change us? Move us? Mold us? Motivate us to act? If so, what is the power of this idea? Of story? How do I make a boom boom positivity bomb inside my chest? How do I become Polly Anna on steroids in word and deed, and create a deliciously positive social contagion? What would that even do? Is that the answer? An answer?
I don’t know, but I think about it a lot. I think about it, and I experiment. I open my ears and I listen. I practice. I notice when I see someone as “other.” I practice sending them love and acceptance. Sometimes my eyes shift, and I can see the “other” as if they were a child. Full of innocence and questions. I try not to “other” them. I question. I try to stay open. I see things happening that I am willing to “fight” for. Things that scare me. I question how I want to fight. If fighting is the answer. Where is the fight taking place exactly? Outside of me, or inside of me? I see more and more division. How do I respond? I do not know. I certainly have more questions than answers. I try to live in that question. I try to keep asking, and imagining, and creating, and dreaming, and loving, and growing, and reaching. I try to fuse ideas inside me that reverberate out. Every day, I wake up and I invite the possibility of a different story. Something ripe with potential, and promise, and the expression of the best parts of us instead of the worst. I don’t know if it makes a difference, but I invite you. I invite you to join me all the same. I invite you to be a part of creating a constellation of bright shiny stars beaming light into the blackness that surrounds us. I invite you to fuse whatever of these ideas appeal to you, and grow, and shine, and expand.
The Revolutionist 